Why Success Doesn’t Silence Self-Doubt
I’m sure you’ve heard about Imposter Syndrome. Maybe you’ve experienced it or are experiencing it right now. It is that quiet fear that you’ve somehow slipped through the cracks. Or that people think you’re more capable than you really are, and it’s only a matter of time before they find out you are some version of a fraud. Even when you’re doing well on paper, the doubt lingers just beneath the surface waiting to be confirmed by some impending failure or mistake.
Many of the high achievers I work with in Vancouver carry this fear. They land promotions, finish degrees, launch successful projects, yet still feel like they haven’t earned it. Instead of building confidence, each achievement becomes another attempt to silence the doubt. But it never really goes away.
What imposter syndrome feels like
People describe:
- Feeling like success is luck, not skill
- Worrying about being “found out” as incompetent
- Dismissing compliments or praise
- Overworking to make up for imagined shortcomings
These thoughts wear you down. They create chronic anxiety, pressure, and burnout, no matter how well things are going on the outside. Over time, people can get locked in a cycle of chasing achievement to feel secure, then feeling like they haven’t done enough once they get there. Granted, each success brings a short burst of relief, but the self-doubt returns, pushing them to prove themselves all over again.
Why high achievers are especially vulnerable
High achievers tend to carry two things at once: discipline and pressure. They’re capable, focused, and used to figuring things out. But the same mindset that drives success can quietly raise the stakes over time.
The shift happens when achievement stops being something you do and starts becoming who you are. It narrows your sense of self. Suddenly, there’s no room for failure, rest, or doubt, only performance. That’s when setbacks hit harder than they should, and even progress can feel fragile.
It doesn’t help that we’re constantly exposed to polished stories of success, people who seem to thrive without struggle. But those stories rarely show the support, privilege, or internal battles behind the scenes. Comparing yourself to them is like running a race you can’t win, and punishing yourself for falling behind.
In fields like healthcare, law, tech, sales, and academia, especially here in Vancouver, I see this often. High pressure. Constant pace. Little time to pause or take inventory. When achievement is always the expectation, even doing well can feel like you’re just avoiding failure.
This is where perfectionism (as a survival strategy) finds its grip
The perfectionism connection
Perfectionism and imposter syndrome feed off each other. When your self-worth gets tied to performance, anything less than flawless can feel like failure. But perfectionism doesn’t always announce itself. It’s not just about wanting things to be neat or polished. It often shows up quietly, as pressure, second-guessing, or the fear of not being taken seriously.
For a salesperson, it might be obsessing over the perfect pitch or email so they don’t come off as sloppy. In tech, it could be the belief that one mistake will expose you as someone who never should’ve been in the room in the first place. It feels like you’re always bracing.
Perfectionism often hides behind the urge to “just do it properly.” And yes, it’s important to learn, improve, and take pride in your work. But that’s not what this is. While growth allows for mistakes, perfectionism treats them as threats. So you keep trying to get it “right” every time, because it feels like your legitimacy depends on it. That’s the trap. But it turns out that the more you chase “perfect,” the more fragile your confidence becomes, because we never quite get to perfect. And that’s exactly where imposter syndrome thrives.
The burnout outcome
When the cycle of pressure, overthinking, and perfectionism runs too long, burnout isn’t just likely, it’s inevitable.
But burnout in high achievers doesn’t always look like collapse. It looks like going through the motions. You’re still delivering, showing up, but the energy behind it is gone. You feel emotionally flat, mentally fogged, or constantly tired. Wins don’t land anymore and instead of feeling proud, you feel behind.
What makes it worse is the confusion: “I’m doing everything I’m supposed to, so why do I feel this disconnected?” That’s usually when people reach out for therapy. Not because they’re failing, but because success no longer feels like enough. The same strategies that got them this far, overwork, self-pressure, constant proving, have quietly turned against them.
How therapy can help
Therapy helps you step out of the loop, so self-doubt doesn’t keep setting the pace. It gives you space to stop performing and start understanding what’s actually driving the pressure.
Some of the strategies we use include:
- Calling out the inner critic: Noticing the voice that constantly questions your worth, and learning how to challenge it instead of just believing it.
- Redefining success: Letting go of “flawless or failure” thinking, and reconnecting with what growth, contribution, or alignment actually look like for you.
- Practicing self-respect: Treating yourself with the same clarity, patience, and fairness you already give to other people.
- Registering your wins: Not just checking the box and moving on, but actually pausing long enough to feel what you’ve earned.
These shifts aren’t complicated, but they do take practice. They ask you to slow down, get honest with yourself, and relate to your own experience in a different way. For people who are used to pushing through, that’s a different and unfamiliar kind of work.
Practical steps you can try now
If you recognize yourself in any of this, here are a few things you can start practicing. Small shifts. Nothing flashy. But over time, they can help you relate to yourself with more accuracy, and less pressure.
- Write down three ways you contributed to something that went well recently. Be specific. Let it be about your input, not just the outcome.
- The next time someone compliments you, don’t deflect. Just say thank you. Let it land, even if only for a second.
- Pick one task this week that doesn’t need to be perfect. Finish it. Let that be enough.
- Before you jump to the next thing, pause. Note what you just did. Let yourself register it before moving on.
You don’t have to do all of these, one is enough. Repeated often, these kinds of moments build something sturdier than perfection. They build self-trust.
How Iroko Health can support you
If this landed with you, you’re not the only one. I work with a lot of capable, driven people who look fine on the outside but feel stuck, uncertain, or unseen underneath it all. You don’t have to keep running on empty or figuring it out alone.
At Iroko Health, I offer therapy that goes deeper than coping strategies. We focus on identity, clarity, and self-trust, so you can stop constantly managing the noise in your head and start living from something more solid.
If you’re curious about how that might look, you’re welcome to start with a free 20-minute consultation. No pressure. Just a chance to talk and see if it feels like a fit.
Start with a free introduction call
About the author
Isi Oboh is the director of Iroko Health, a therapy practice based in Vancouver. He works with driven, emotionally reserved individuals who look strong on the outside but often feel overwhelmed, disconnected, or stuck on the inside. His approach blends clinical depth with grounded, real-world insight, helping clients reclaim clarity, confidence, and internal alignment.
